How to discourage questioning in an online horse forum

Table of Contents

Most popular technique: Do not read the question (or just read the first few lines)
Runner-up: Read the question but ignore it and get straight to the point
For the truly bored: Read the question and then answer the question that should have been asked
Easiest: Answer with another question
A perennial favorite: Hijack the comment thread with a sensitive topic

Most popular technique: Do not read the question (or just read the first few lines).

The location of the question is enough to go on.

• Example 1: if it’s on a page about riding endurance, the questioner probably knows nothing about the sport, isn’t a member of AERC (American Endurance Ride Conference), and if he or she knows anything at all about horses, that knowledge is completely irrelevant to riding endurance.
  • The best response is to tell the person to:
    • join AERC
    • Locate and read all the back issues of Endurance News (plus an assortment of books, bonus if you’ve written it yourself)
    • Find a mentor
    • Buy an Arabian
    • Go back to groundwork
    • Do long slow distance
    • Buy expensive colorful tack
• Example 2: if it’s on a page about Equine welfare, the questioner needs to change a lot of things, starting with:
  • Take all steel off of horse’s hooves
  • Free feed grass hay
  • Buy expensive salts. the value of NaCl depends upon color and packaging
  • assume the horse has metabolic syndrome
  • when all else fails, move to a different state

Reading the comments on the question is more fun.

• Zero in on one you really disagree with and start a sub-discussion about all the reasons it’s wrong
• While replying to a comment, try to spark yet another discussion. Bonus points if it’s entirely unrelated to the original post
• at some point you will notice the letters “OP” and wonder briefly what they mean.

If the post includes a picture, that’s enough to go on anyway.

• for example, if it’s a quarter horse on an endurance Web page, the OP clearly needs to be told to buy an Arabian
• Alternatively, if the picture shows a horse standing in mud, the best advice is to move states.
  • Warning: if the picture was taken in California, you might hold off on that advice. “move to another state for a week or two” is probably good enough.
• If the picture includes tack, it’s probably poorly adjusted, the wrong type, or possibly the wrong color.
  • You’re probably safe offering one of the saddles that’s been gathering dust in your tackroom.
  • Alternatively, suggest a different color scheme.
  • Mention all of the ways the tack is going to hurt the horse, put the rider at risk, or reflects outdated training methods.
• If a horse is being fed in the picture, chances are it’s the wrong food, or possibly the right food in the wrong location
  • possible comments:
    • Feed on the ground
    • put it in a hay bag
    • use a slow feeder
    • Have you had that hay analyzed?
    • I would never feed my horse that! (or “that way!”)
    • Horses need access to hay 24/7.

Runner-up: Read the question but ignore it and get straight to the point.

Examples include:

• Question: “How do I condition my (Quarter horse/draft cross/gaited horse/paint)?”
  • Possible answers:
    • Get an Arabian
    • Go back to groundwork
    • join AERC
    • Buy a comfortable saddle. I’m a dealer/I’ve got one I don’t use anymore…
    • Following.
• Question: “Any suggestions for conditioning during winter?”
  • Possible answers:
    • Move to different state
    • Go back to groundwork
    • I only ride every six weeks during the winter
    • I ride 20 miles all winter through the ice and snow in -20F
    • Following.
• Question: “What sort of shoes should I use to avoid slipping on asphalt?”
  • Possible answers:
    • Steel is evil.
    • My horses have been barefoot and happy for years.
    • NEVER ride on asphalt!
    • Feed a ration balancer.
    • Nails permanently damage hooves.
    • Buy boots, I’m a dealer.
    • Whatever you do, do not reply with “Following.”
• Question: “I’m riding in a snaffle and would like to have a bit more control. Suggestions for a slightly stronger bit?”
  • Possible answers:
    • Go bitless.
    • Snaffles are terrible, they pinch the tongue and poke the palate.
    • Go back to groundwork.
    • Get a trainer.
    • Stop feeding alfalfa.
    • Treat for ulcers.

For the truly bored: Read the question and then answer the question that should have been asked.

Because sometimes what people need to know isn’t the same as what they want to know…

Examples:

• “My horse gets a bit silly in cold weather, especially if it’s windy. He’s great on the ground, but as soon as I am in the saddle, he wants to buck. He’s even gotten me off once with a HUGE buck! Does anyone know of exercises I can do from the saddle to avoid the bucking?”
  • Possible answers:
    • Stop feeding alfalfa.
    • It’s probably pain, get the vet/osteopath/chiro/acupuncturist out ASAP!!
    • It’s your saddle, better get a saddle fitter out. You probably need a new one, try (brand that starts at $2,000)
      • Bonus points for being a dealer or having a used saddle to sell.
    • Go back to groundwork.
    • Treat for ulcers.
    • Go bitless.
• “I’d like to start feeding my horse grain/pellets. She’s a hard keeper in moderate work. Can anyone recommend a good pelleted feed?”
  • Possible answers:
    • Grain is bad for horses, it’s not natural.
      • Bonus points if you start an argument about the definition of grain vs pelleted food.
    • Give her grass hay only, in a hay net hung high.
      • Bonus points if you start an argument about where to feed hay, high or low, fast or slow…
    • Treat for ulcers.
    • You don’t need to be riding every day, it’s bad for endurance horses.
    • Horses need to have access to forage 24/7.

Easiest: Answer with another question.

Examples:

• “My boarding stable only feeds three times a day, so I want to leave my horse with a couple of hay nets in his stall. Can anyone recommend one that won’t break easily?”
  • Possible answers:
    • Did you know that your horses’ necks will be injured if they have to twist to get hay out of nets?
    • Can you change boarding facilities? I wouldn’t keep my horse anywhere they only feed 3 times a day.
    • Is your horse getting any grain?
    • How much turnout does your horse get?
• “We’ve just bought a 5-acre parcel with a 4-stall barn. I want to build three turnout paddocks, but the terrain is irregular and there are trees. Does anyone have suggestions for fencing?”
  • Possible answers:
    • Can you buy a bigger place? That’s going to be too small.
    • How many horses do you have?
    • Do you plan to leave those poor horses in a stall?
    • Did you investigate all fence building possibilities before buying the property?
    • Is your house on the property?

A perennial favorite: Hijack the comment thread with a sensitive topic.

This works to discourage questioning in horse fora with practically any question. Efficacy of suggested topics depend on the group.

• An important way to discourage questioning in an online horse forum that I had forgotten is when to start a horse under saddle!
  • possibly the most controversial issue ever 😉 
  • See my post on equine bone maturity
•  USEF
  • Good for more than one group, though for AERC, it might not work as well now after the schism. On the other hand, there’s always FEI.
• To blanket or not to blanket.
• Whip use
• Steel shoes (vs. barefoot)
• Alfalfa pros and cons
• Worming
• For breed-specific groups (especially Morgans):
  • Bloodlines (usually along the lines of old/classic/foundation vs. all types of new)
  • movement in hunt classes
  • shoeing: length of toe, weight, regulations, straps…
  • Old vs. new types (of in-hand, park, English pleasure, etc. horse)
• To grain or not to grain
• Bits vs bitless.
• Ulcers.
• Turnout.
• Suitability of a breed for a sport.
• Helmet use.
• Breeding (vs. rescue)
• ….

If you’ve got any further suggestions on how to discourage questioning in an online horse forum, please leave them in a comment!